A year ago we thought we were living our dream. Turns out we were still living everyone else’s version of it.
The People-Pleasing Trap
We were giving people arrival dates like we owed them a schedule. Rushing from spot to spot to hit timelines we didn’t set. When Zach didn’t feel up to driving the planned 200 miles, we’d get messages asking where we were. When our cat took an hour-long exploration break in the woods (as cats do), we’d stress about being “behind schedule.”
People kept asking when we were going to “settle down”—not realizing this is our version of settling down. The bus is our home. It’s not a phase we’re going to outgrow. This lifestyle isn’t a detour—it IS the tour. But even well-meaning expectations, spoken or implied, started shaping our decisions. And somewhere in that, we lost sight of what we were actually building.
So even in a bus built to escape expectations, we were still letting them steer.
When Everything Broke Down
The realization hit hard. We weren’t living bus life—we were managing other people’s timelines inside it. Driving to meet dates we didn’t set. Showing up for plans that weren’t ours. Trying to feel free while dragging obligations behind us.
So we stopped. Took the break we needed. Had some breakdowns—us and the bus, which turned out to be related. Spent months figuring out that we weren’t actually traveling. We were just relocating on command, and paying for it in exhaustion.
The break wasn’t fun, but it was necessary. We had to remember why we chose this life in the first place—and how to actually live it, not just accommodate it.
What Authentic Bus Life Actually Looks Like
We’ll get there when we get there.
It’s not a cute saying on a bumper sticker. It’s a boundary. If that doesn’t work for someone’s expectations, we don’t go. This isn’t being flaky or unreliable – it’s being honest about what this life actually requires. Some days the bus needs a rest. Other days Zach does. And sometimes we find something worth staying for. That’s not poor planning – that’s the whole point.
We’re back, and we’re finally doing this right. The stories we have to share come from actually living this life.
This is what Authentic Bus Life actually looks like—messy 🌀, unscheduled 🗓️, built around real needs 🧦 and real joy 🎈, our no-itinerary itinerary. (I am a planner, but I also can go with the flow, so I plan a day and then wing it!)
And that makes all the difference.
We’re not starting over — we’re just starting fresh. If it’s been a while, here’s a reminder of who we are, who the dogs are, and which cats are ours. The cat count has changed. The survival logic hasn’t.